12 October, 2003
Overbearing Relatives
21:09:12 | Ranting | 
An incident which happened today made me come to the conclusion that personal relatives usually say the words which are most painful to one’s ears. They just do not know the right thing to say. Each time I enter my grandmother’s house, either my uncle(s) or my auntie(s) always feel as though it is their responsibility to tell me what is lacking in my appearance, personality and yadda yadda. Let me pose a question. Is having long hair a crime? So why are they always complaining that my hair is too long for their liking, my clothing are too bright to match their standards…etc? All these do not even matter much to me since I hardly care about how I look. So why am I always compared with others? External looks no longer count in today’s modern society. So why do they keep bothering about my appearance?
For goodness sake, nobody is perfect. If they want me to match up with their standards all the time, I suggest that they go and take a long hike, preferably one that lasts for 10 years. I am me, myself, with my own preferences and personality and it is high time that they accept that. If something like that is impossible, I suggest that they go and find some other cousin to pick on and leave me alone.
After Uncle Daniel passed that hurting comment about me today, I stormed out of the room and started to kao beh (Translation: nag and complain) at the rest of my relatives. This time, I have had it. I told them everything I had in my mind at that moment. About, how they are constantly passing hurtful comments about me and how they are always controlling me. No, this is not a cry for attention. I am someone who has to make my opinions known. Why should I always sit there, keeping mum all the time and suffering under the way they are constantly comparing me with others as well as making comments about me? I do not have to take this from them and it is definitely time that I put a stop to all these nonsense.
To make things worse, sometimes they even discuss about me even though I am right in front of them, as though I do not even exist.
Above all, this is the absolute worst time that my relatives have to do this. I was already extremely agitated during the day due to examination stress and thus, any incident no matter how slight can easily provoke me. And the fact that the Physics Promotional Exams are tomorrow isn’t helping at all.
I would be missing in action for the next 2 days as I have to continue revising for my upcoming papers. Having Physics tomorrow followed by Chemistry and Mathematics on Tuesday. After those two torturous days end, it would be time to smell the fresh air.
C O M M E N T S (11)
Some relatives are like that and I also noticed that relatives do have a tendency to be tactless because she keep thinking that since they r related to you, they can say anything they want.
I like the way u stood up to them. good for you.
maybe coz your fam’s rather close don’t you think? meeting up every now and then. I only see my relatives during cny or some BIG occasion. at times I don’t even see them for YEARS!
yeah.. i also think it’s coz ur relatives are so close to you, they tend to be more straightforward and just say whatever they want to say, thinking you won’t mind. At least now they know you do. :)
ohyea.. jiayou for promos! I’m sure you’ll do well.. :D
Nadine & Bingz >> Probably… but my distant relatives do that also! After not seeing them for so many years, the first time they c u, their first words will be…
“Waah! You’re so tall already!”
“You looked nicer last time”
“Do you have a boyfriend or not?”
Really irritating… :x
my fren oso complain abt her relatives abt this matter… im ok with it, at least they bother to tok to u and not treat u as invisible (some of my relatives do that, dun even wan to look at me!). its juz their ‘auntie’ way of being concerned/kpo la haha. relax abit, ’sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me!’ :)
hey brenda, cheer up! sometimes, they can be insensitive because they forget how it is to be in their shoes. Ah well, u’re right to feel upset and u shud let them know how u feel… all the best, i dunnoe how many times I’ve said this but… all the best
u stood up against them and that’s a good thing. it’s better to let them know how u r feeling, instead of suffocating urself with ur tots. u go gurl~
That’s the way man~ Talk Back! After all, adults may not always be right. Since they disrepect you, why should you respect them by not talking back? Horrible adults~
Stephanie >> Hehe :p
my mum tinks long hair is awful but i clearly don’t c anything wrong with hving long hair too! my relatives like to gossip as well.
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all the best for all your papers, brenda. hope you can score well for all of them. =)